第二章（第4/8页）

然而自从意识到自己再也无法行走，克利福德就变得极端怯懦。除了自家的仆从，他不愿见到任何其他的人。因为残废的他只能坐在轮椅或者巴斯椅上。然而，他仍会像以往一样，穿着高级裁缝为他量身剪裁的高档服装，系着邦德街买回的精致领带，若仅看上半身，他依旧风流倜傥，气度非凡。克利福德本就没有时下青年的那副娘娘腔，红润的脸庞，外加宽厚的肩膀，让他看起来倒有几分牧民的气质。但他那细微迟疑的声音，兼具果敢与畏缩、自信与不安的眼神，则透露出他的本性。他的举止有时傲慢得让人难以忍受，有时却谨慎谦恭到怯懦战栗的地步。

Connie and he were attached to one another, in the aloof modern way. He was much too hurt in himself, the great shock of his maiming, to be easy and flippant. He was a hurt thing. And as such Connie stuck to him passionately.

康妮和他彼此依恋，又相互疏远，这可是时下夫妻间最盛行的相处之道。因伤致残对克利福德的打击过重，使其心灵倍受煎熬，再也无法像过去那般轻松释然。可怜的他身心俱伤。而康妮则对他情根深种，不离不弃。

But she could not help feeling how little connexion he really had with people. The miners were, in a sense, his own men; but he saw them as objects rather than men, parts of the pit rather than parts of life, crude raw phenomena rather than human beings along with him. He was in some way afraid of them, he could not bear to have them look at him now he was lame. And their queer, crude life seemed as unnatural as that of hedgehogs.

但她还是不禁觉得丈夫与他人缺乏沟通。矿工们可以说都是他的仆从，但他始终把他们当作没有生命的物体、而非活生生的人来看待，当他们是矿场而非生活的组成部分，是粗鄙天然事物，而非和自己一般无二的人类。克利福德甚至有些惧怕他们，受不了让他们看到自己如今这副残缺不全的模样。而他们过着古怪粗劣的生活，简直跟反常的刺猬没什么两样。

He was remotely interested; but like a man looking down a microscope, or up a telescope. He was not in touch. He was not in actual touch with anybody, save, traditionally, with Wragby, and, through the close bond of family defence, with Emma. Beyond this nothing really touched him. Connie felt that she herself didn't really, not really touch him; perhaps there was nothing to get at ultimately; just a negation of human contact.

他远远地关注着他们的行为举动，像是通过显微镜或者望远镜去观察事物一样。但却跟他们没有半点往来。除了跟拉格比府的传统纽带、以及和艾玛的血亲关系，他几乎与其他任何人都没有实质性的接触。除此之外，没有什么能真正触及他的内心。康妮觉得连自己也无法真正确实地拨动丈夫的心弦，或许根本没有什么能做到这一点，克利福德的存在恰恰是对人际交往的某种否定。

Yet he was absolutely dependent on her, he needed her every moment. Big and strong as he was, he was helpless. He could wheel himself about in a wheeled chair, and he had a sort of bath-chair with a motor attachment, in which he could puff slowly round the park. But alone he was like a lost thing. He needed Connie to be there, to assure him he existed at all.

但他对妻子的依赖已经到达无可附加的地步，时时刻刻需要她陪在身旁。他虽然魁梧健硕，却无法自立。他能够驱动轮椅四处走走，还可以驾着装有马达的巴斯轮椅，缓缓地在自家园林里兜圈。但每当独处，他就像只迷途的羔羊。他需要康妮伴随左右，只有如此，才能确信自己真真切切地活在世间。

Still he was ambitious. He had taken to writing stories; curious, very personal stories about people he had known. Clever, rather spiteful, and yet, in some mysterious way, meaningless. The observation was extraordinary and peculiar. But there was no touch, no actual contact. It was as if the whole thing took place in a vacuum. And since the field of life is largely an artificially-lighted stage today, the stories were curiously true to modern life, to the modern psychology, that is.