第十七章

"You see, Hilda," said Connie after lunch, when they were nearing London, "you have never known either real tenderness or real sensuality: and if you do know them, with the same person, it makes a great difference.” "For mercy's sake don't brag about your experiences!" said Hilda.

“你知道，希尔达，”吃过午饭，伦敦已经在望，康妮说，“你从未体验过难分难舍的温情或者如胶似漆的性爱，如果能在同一个男人身上兼得两者，那更会让你有与众不同的美妙感觉。”“行行好，别再夸耀你的丰富经验了！”希尔达说。

"I've never met the man yet who was capable of intimacy with a woman, giving himself up to her. That was what I wanted. I'm not keen on their self-satisfied tenderness, and their sensuality. I'm not content to be any man's little petsy-wetsy, nor his Chair À Plaisir either. I wanted a complete intimacy, and I didn't get it. That's enough for me.”

“能跟女人亲密无间，将全部身心尽数奉献的男人，我还真没遇到过。我需要的正是这种男人。至于那种自以为是的温情和性欲，我根本就没放在眼里。我不想做任何男人的玩偶，或者沦为泄欲的工具。我想要亲密无间的感情，但并未得到。对我来说那就够了。”

Connie pondered this. Complete intimacy! She supposed that meant revealing everything concerning yourself to the other person, and his revealing everything concerning himself. But that was a bore. And all that weary self-consciousness between a man and a woman! a disease!

康妮思考着姐姐的话。亲密无间的感情！依照她的猜想，这意味着彼此完全坦诚相见，毫无私隐。可这该多无聊呀。在男女情感中，无法完全忘却自我，最终会让双方都筋疲力尽！那简直就是种心理疾病！

"I think you're too conscious of yourself all the time, with everybody," she said to her sister.

“依我看，你和别人相处的时候，往往太在乎自己。”她提醒姐姐。

"I hope at least I haven't a slave nature," said Hilda.

“我只希望自己不要沾染上奴性。”希尔达说。

"But perhaps you have! Perhaps you are a slave to your own idea of yourself." Hilda drove in silence for some time after this piece of unheard of insolence from that chit Connie.

“可或许你恰恰就无法摆脱这种天性！大概奴役你的正是自我意识。”有一段时间，希尔达只是一声不吭地开着车，心里想着，康妮这小丫头，竟然说出如此无礼的言语。

"At least I'm not a slave to somebody else's idea of me: and the somebody else a servant of my husband's," she retorted at last, in crude anger.

“至少我不会受别人思想的支配，更不会听我丈夫的奴仆指手画脚。”她终于忍无可忍，发起反击。

"You see, it's not so," said Connie calmly.

“并非你想象的那样。”康妮平静地回应道。

She had always let herself be dominated by her elder sister. Now, though somewhere inside herself she was weeping, she was free of the dominion of other women. Ah! that in itself was a relief, like being given another life: to be free of the strange dominion and obsession of other women.

她向来甘愿接受姐姐的支配。而此时此刻，虽然内心在泣血，但她却从另一个女人的掌控中解脱出来。啊！这本身就是种解脱，好像重获新生，摆脱其他女人的控制和纠缠。

How awful they were, women!

女人是多么可怕的动物呀！

She was glad to be with her father, whose favourite she had always been. She and Hilda stayed in a little hotel off Pall Mall, and Sir Malcolm was in his club. But he took his daughters out in the evening, and they liked going with him.

与父亲重聚，让康妮很开心，因为她始终是父亲的宠儿。她和希尔达住在帕尔玛尔的小旅馆里，而马尔科姆爵士则留在俱乐部里。但到晚上，他就会带着两个女儿出去玩，她俩也都愿意跟父亲同往。